The Sweet Potato Queens' 1st Big-Ass Novel

Stuff we didn't actually do, but could have, and may yet.
by Jill Conner Browne w/ Karin Gillespie

Makes me wish I was southern, and built, and daring!
(and able to eat all of those calories without growing as big as a barn)

Quotes I like:

"Nature, it seems, is much kinder to caterpillars than to thirteen year old girls. When a caterpillar is busy turning into a butterfly, are other caterpillars allowed to watch, point, and snicker? Nosiree Bob. The caterpillar is locked up tight in its cocoon, and if anyone should come knocking, the caterpillar says, 'Go away! Can'tcha see I'm in here metamorphosing?' But a 13 year old girl is forced to change in plain sight of the whole world!"

"It it ain't fun, we ain't doing it. Polka's fun, Patsy offered. Good Suggestion, Swiss Miss, Mary Bennett said. I am particulary fond of strip poker."

"You know....hunny, girls who look like YOU gen'lly have to be NICE- you ain't NEARLY good -lookin' enough to be such a fuckin' bitch!"

"She has a moustache." "I wouldn't discount a mustache so quickly," Mary Bennett said. "Just means the girl has plenty of testosterone coursing through her veins. She's prolly a wildcat between the sheets."

"Don't fret, hunny," Mary Beth said, "There's no shame in being sent to the loony bin. Everybody goes a little crazy now and then."

"He's tall, dark, and handsome," Mary Bennet said, "He thinks the sun shines out my ass and he is an absolute MINK in bed- Jill, hunny, he knows ALL ABOUT, ' the little man in the boat'!"

"Have you ever thought 'bout mindin' your own fuckin' business?"
"Hell no!"

"I never wear panties to a party. Panty lines, you know."

"When someone knocks you down. You gotta get right back. No point in wallowing in it."

"Getting everything to go well at once is like trying to stuff an octopus under the bed. One leg's always flopping out."